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Witches vs Princesses by D. M. Larson

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ACT 1 SCENE 2

(Carey POTTER is the next witch setting her trap)

POTTER

Welcome all of you to the Potter School of Wizardy Stuff.

DRAKO

Hey where's Potter?

POTTER

I am Potter.

DRAKO

No you're not.

POTTER

Yes that's me Carey Potter.

BELLA

That's false advertising.

POTTER

No it's not - it's the Potter school and my last name is Potter.

DRAKO

Let's go.

LUNA

Yeah.

POTTER

No wait - you want to meet Harry or you wanna learn magic?

(They look at each other)

BELLA

We wanna meet Harry.

POTTER

Wait. You can use magic to make Harry appear... or any other celebrity... (names some currently popular celebrities)

LUNA

That sounds cool.

DRAKO

Sign me up!

POTTER

Now here are your wands... (Stops DRAKO from waving it around) Careful those are loaded... (DRAKO is picking his nose with his wand) And no nose picking - you'll turn yourself into a toad or something.

LUNA

There's too many rules. This is no fun.

BELLA

What happens if I wave my wand like this?!

(DRAKO and LUNA freeze)

POTTER

That happens.

BELLA

This is fun.

(BELLA arranges them in silly poses)

POTTER

You done?

BELLA

Almost

(Does one last silly thing)

BELLA

Done.

POTTER

Wave your wand in reverse and unfreeze them.

(She does and she laughs)

DRAKO

What happened?

BELLA

Magic!

POTTER

You have a talent my dear.

BELLA

Why thank you.

DRAKO

Did you do real magic?

BELLA

I did.

LUNA

That is so cool. My turn.

(LUNA waves her wand around like crazy but nothing happens)

DRAKO

Maybe yours is broken.

POTTER

It takes patience and practice... Or incredible luck like her.

DRAKO

So how do we start?

POTTER

You get a penny and wave your wand like this and say "penny for your thoughts" and turn it in to gold.

DRAKO

Gold?!

LUNA

Sounds good to me.

POTTER

Go home. Get a penny and then bring me back some gold.

DRAKO

Couldn't we lie and say we did it and bring you some gold?

POTTER

That works for me.

BELLA

"Penny for your thoughts" It didn't work.

POTTER

You will need to practice on this one then.

BELLA

Pooh.

POTTER

Or you can try the phrase "the buck stops here."

LUNA

"The buck stops here" ...nope.

POTTER

Or "money money money".

DRAKO

"Money money money" Ah man - no luck.

POTTER

Keep practicing.

LUNA

Let's see you do it.

DRAKO

Yeah.

POTTER

It's never good to overuse a spell. And I have plenty of gold.

LUNA

I could never have enough gold.

BELLA

How much gold do you have?

POTTER

Lots... All thanks to this spell.

DRAKO

We have to keep practicing.

POTTER

And after you learn that one, I will teach you one that turns coal to diamonds.

LUNA

Really?! Tell me tell me tell me!

POTTER

Gold first, then diamonds - go home and practice - practice makes perfect you know - keep waving those wands and making magic!

(They go...)

POTTER

They have fallen right in to my trap...

(Evil laugh)

END OF SCENE





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