by D. M. Larson
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Copyright (c) 2015 - Please do not repost this play online or share without permission.
Being the new kid at school is like discovering a new planet. Everything is strange and confusing and you're the weird alien everyone is afraid of - well not fear - you are the gross bugged eyes creature that's completely misunderstood.
(LUKE speaks like an alien to someone passing)
"I come in peace." Ignored as usual. Maybe I have on my cloaking device? No one seems to see me.
(He tries talking to more people as they pass and does the related hand motions for the following [ie Star Trek, Mork and Mindy])
Live long and prosper! Nano nano! Those are my geek gang signs.
May the force be with you. How come that one doesn't have a hand sign? It really needs one.
(He tries out different hand and arm motions)
May the force be with you... may the force be with you... may the force make you live long and prosper. I like that. I need to make a t-shirt with that on there.
You know, the principal made me change my shirt. I had one with Spock doing the Vulcan hand signs saying “Go Trek Yourself” Like anyone could be offended by that. He said students are not allowed to wear anything with words on it. Isn't that ironic? A school banning words.
School is not the place to be unique or stand out. They have this mold they want everyone to fit into. If you're not a certain way the whole school says you're not their type and they reject you.
Rejection - life is all about rejection. I am proud to say I have always been the last to be picked for any school activity. Especially when it’s sports. I try to make sure I'm last - and if I am really lucky they have too many team members so I have so sit out. To make sure I am last to be picked I always limp so they think I am a liability - and if they don't notice the limp, I add in a nose pick because who wants to pass the ball to a nose picker? Oh, that's a good idea for a hand sign.
(LUKE picks his nose and holds out his finger)
May the force be with you.
They noticed that one. I know that’s gross but hey, I have my bug-eyed creature reputation to maintain.
END OF MONOLOGUE
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SCENE 1 - BUG-EYED CREATURE (LUKE)
SCENE 2 - CARRY A STUFFY (LAYLA)
SCENE 3 - CALL ME DUMPER (LANE)
SCENE 4 - PUNCH BOY (BING)
SCENE 5 - NO WITNESSES (MOIRA)
SCENE 6 - THE MUMMY GIRL (JANEY)
SCENE 7 - ODE TO THE SQUISHED (MR. DAVIS)
SCENE 8 - PROTECTO (KID HERO) (LUKE)
SCENE 9 - MAGICAL RAINBOWS (LAYLA)
SCENE 10 - A SONG FOR GRANDMA (BING)
SCENE 11 - FOREVER TREE (JANEY)
SCENE 12 - CUT OFF FROM THE WORLD (MOIRA)
SCENE 13 - TEACHERS EAT THEIR YOUNG (MR. DAVIS)
SCENE 14 - WHO WANTS TO BE MY BULLY? (LUKE)
SCENE 15 - PARENTING 101 (BING)
SCENE 16 - EMPTY BUCKETS (LANE)
SCENE 17 - GOOD FOR EACH OTHER (LAYLA)
SCENE 18 - FORGET ABOUT ME (MOIRA)
SCENE 19 - MYSTICAL EYES (BING)
SCENE 20 - ONLY CHILDREN BELIEVE IN BUTTERFLIES (JANEY)
SCENE 21 - SAFETY IN NUMBERS (MR. DAVIS)
SCENE 22 - END THE HURTING
STRONG ENOUGH FOR BOTH OF US
TEARING ME APART
SHADOWS OF THE PAST
MUCH MADNESS MONOLOGUE
Funny short version of CARRY A STUFFY for male (Biker version)
Male version of CALL ME DUMPER
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D. M. and Shiela Larson
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