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"DEAD END JOB"
Scene for 3 actors (2 male, 1 female)
from a published play
by D. M. Larson
(MINDY is dressed in a trench coat, hat and sunglasses, looking fashionable mysterious)
MINDY
Alone at last.
RALPH
What are you doing here?
MINDY
I got lonely... you've been gone all day.
RALPH
I went to all the trouble to hide you and get you somewhere safe... and now you're back here again. In the thick of it. There's a cop here.
MINDY
How exciting.
RALPH
No it's not. It's dangerous. I want you to be safe. I want to take care of you.
MINDY
You're so sweet. That's why I couldn't stay away from you. I need you. I need more of last night.
RALPH
That was pretty nice.
MINDY
I thought you hated this place. I thought you wanted to give up on this dead end job and run away with me.
RALPH
I do. I’m tired of doing everything right. I’m tired of following all the rules. Where has it gotten me? I’m in a dead end job where I get passed over for promotion after promotion. I do more on this floor than everyone put together. But hard work isn’t what matters. It’s all about being someone’s friend, someone’s drinking buddy… a good old boy is who succeeds. I just wanted to do my job. I just wanted to be really really good at it and get rewarded for my hard work. Is that too much to ask? It’s too much to expect I guess. Somehow I got this powerful work ethic pounded into me at an early age. I’m sick of it though. It’s draining the life out of me… and I haven’t even lived.
But when we ran away together… something changed… I was excited for the first time in my life… Something inside me broke free… my soul perhaps… my spirit… it had been caged up and hidden away. But you had the key… the key to free my soul and give it wings.
I sound crazy don’t I? I feel a little crazy now. Crazy in a good way. Crazy in the best way possible. And it’s because of you. Somehow you found a way to help me escape the nightmare of my life… the living death that entombed me. But now I am free.
That night we spent together… it was the best night of my life. I have never been so happy. I’m not ever sure I knew what happy was before last night. I never wanted it to end.
MINDY
Then why did you leave you jerk? Why did you come back here?
RALPH
I wanted to come back to make sure we were taken care of.
MINDY
What do you mean?
RALPH
I have a plan… something that will make sure we’re taken care of for a long time.
MINDY
You are crazy.
RALPH
I know… isn’t it grand?
(MAX, the police detective, enters)
MAX
Grand indeed. Hello, Ralph. I see you’re working late.
RALPH
Don't you know it's not polite to listen to people's private conversations?
MAX
But it sounded so close to a confession that I couldn't help myself.
RALPH
Aren't you a little foolish to confront a suspected killer alone? Or do you have a SWAT team waiting outside?
MAX
This is a high profile case. Your boss has a lot of important friends who want to see his killer pay for what he... or she... has done. I don't want some lazy commissioner waltzing in at the last minute and taking all the credit for this. This is my case and I want to follow this to the end.
RALPH
Well, the end is near. So no one knows you're here? All alone... no backup? Cocky... and stupid.
(RALPH pulls a gun)
MINDY
I wondered where my gun went.
RALPH
I thought I might need it again.
MINDY
Good thinking.
MAX
You're Mindy right?
MINDY
What's it to you?
MAX
Mindy... you really think you can trust, Ralph?
MINDY
I'd trust him with my life.
MAX
What if I told you he took out a life insurance policy on you today?
MINDY
What?
MAX
Planning on collecting now or later, Ralph?
MINDY
What's he talking about?
RALPH
I did take one out on her. With myself as the beneficiary. But I also took one out on you Max. And I plan on collecting yours tonight.
(RALPH shoots MAX)
MINDY
What's going on, Ralph? Did you really take out a policy on me? Are you going to kill me?
RALPH
Never.
(Ralph gives her the gun)
RALPH (CONT.)
In fact, I took one out on myself. With you as the beneficiary...
MINDY
I'm still mad.
RALPH
Yours is for twice as much... you'll get a million if I die.
MINDY
Really? Okay, you're forgiven.
RALPH
I also backdated a policy on Pete which I've collected on already. Now we have Max to add to our retirement funds.
MINDY
But won't they figure out what we're up to?
RALPH
That's why I've been here all day. I used fake names and accounts that are difficult to track. I know this system better than the designers. By the time they sort it all out we'll be long gone.
MINDY
I love you... you're amazing! Run away with me... for real this time. Don't just send me away and leave me alone. I can't be alone.
RALPH
You'll never be alone. Never again. We'll always be together... forever. And never another worry again.
MINDY
I knew you would make all my dreams come true.
RALPH
You're better than dreams. You're better than anything I can imagine.
MINDY
Where are we going? Mexico? Cuba? Russia?
RALPH
How about Montana?
MINDY
Montana?
RALPH
Big, beautiful and empty. That's the last place they'll look.
MINDY
Sounds lovely... isn't it cold there?
RALPH
I'll get you some warm fuzzy boots.
MINDY
I love fuzzy boots. Let's go, lover.
END OF SCENE
***
For permission to use this scene, please email doug@freedrama.net (include the title "Dead End Job" in your request).
For the published play, "Death of an Insurance Salesman"
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