Telling Tales of Christmas Songs
For the play “Telling Tales of Christmas” by D. M. Larson
Play the songs after the related scene or turn the play into a musical and sing along.
SONG LIST:
Santa’s Secret Summer Hideaway
Father Christmas - Christmas Behind Glass
The Elf Who Almost Ruined Christmas
Listen: http://www.freedrama.net/TellingTale1SantaSecretSummerHideaway.mp3
[Verse 1]
In the woods where the pine trees sway
Santa's got a summer hideaway
No snow no sleigh just the sun’s warm ray
He’s flipping pancakes every day
[Prechorus]
Creepy elf by the rocking chair
With a one-eyed doll and a vacant stare
Ho Ho Ho fills the humid air
[Chorus]
Santa’s secret summer hideaway
Where winter fun meets summer play
You can check in but you might stay
Forever wrapped in Christmas Day
[Verse 2]
They play reindeer ring toss on the lawn
Sing carols till the crack of dawn
The Christmas spirit feels a bit… off
Like candy canes dipped in hot sauce
[Prechorus]
The great master of Christmas grins
Says
“Let the summer games begin”
But the creepy elf just rubs his chin
[Chorus]
Santa’s secret summer hideaway
Where winter fun meets summer play
You can check in but you might stay
Forever wrapped in Christmas Day
Listen: https://www.freedrama.net/TellingTale2PuppyforChristmas.mp3
[Verse]
This Christmas I’d like a puppy dog
With a wagging tail and a happy hop
Better than a reindeer or a smelly hog
A little furball I’ll never swap
[Chorus]
Oh
I want a puppy
Yes I do
A friend who barks and loves me too
Puppy dog
Under the tree
That’s the perfect gift for me
[Verse 2]
No socks
No ties
No boring stuff
Just a pup that’s sweet and scruff
With floppy ears and tiny paws
Chewing toys with tiny jaws
[Chorus]
Oh
I want a puppy
Yes I do
A friend who barks and loves me too
Puppy dog
Under the tree
That’s the perfect gift for me
[Bridge]
Forget the hogs
They smell so bad
No oinks or snorts to make me glad
A puppy’s heart is pure and true
It’s Christmas magic
Me and you
[Chorus]
Oh
I want a puppy
Yes I do
A friend who barks and loves me too
Puppy dog
Under the tree
That’s the perfect gift for me
Listen: https://www.freedrama.net/TellingTale3WherestheTurkey.mp3
[Verse]
The table's set but something's wrong
The turkey's gone where's it belong
Gravy waits it’s gettin’ cold
Who’s the thief so bold so bold
[Chorus]
Where’s the turkey who stole the bird
Gobble gobble good this is absurd
We’re so hungry gotta find it quick
Catch the culprit what a trick
[Verse 2]
Mashed potatoes sit and stare
Stuffing’s lonely needs its pair
Pumpkin pie says hey don’t look at me
I’m just dessert I’m not guilty
[Chorus]
Where’s the turkey who stole the bird
Gobble gobble good this is absurd
We’re so hungry gotta find it quick
Catch the culprit what a trick
[Bridge]
Footprints lead out to the yard
The dog’s in cahoots playing guard
Uncle Joe says it wasn’t him
But his grin says that’s a fib
[Chorus]
Where’s the turkey who stole the bird
Gobble gobble good this is absurd
We’re so hungry gotta find it quick
Catch the culprit what a trick
Listen: https://www.freedrama.net/TellingTale4BlackFridayBlues.mp3
[Verse]
Alarm clock screaming before the sun
Grab my sneakers gotta run run run
Coffee's cold but who has time
This is war it's shopping crime
[Prechorus]
The line's a serpent long and mean
Elbows flying it's a Black Friday scene
[Chorus]
Grumpy fussy funny too
Standing in line with a cranky crew
Doors still locked and I’m stuck with you
Black Friday blues Black Friday blues
[Verse 2]
Some dude's cutting I see red
"Back of the line!" but he shakes his head
Salvation Army's got that bell
Ding ding ding like a shopping spell
[Prechorus]
The shelves are empty hearts are sore
But someone’s laughing walking out the door
[Chorus]
Grumpy fussy funny too
Waiting for deals but I’m overdue
Nothing left just a lousy shoe
Black Friday blues Black Friday blues
[Verse 1]
I took a tumble in aisle nine
Got trampled by a sale sign
Flat-screen TVs broke my spine
Black Friday sure ain't kind
Listen: https://www.freedrama.net/TellingTale5BlackFridaySelfie.mp3
[Prechorus]
Where’s my family? I’m in a cast
Where are they? Still shopping fast
[Chorus]
Oh where is everyone?
They’re still out shopping
I’m here in a gown
And the morphine’s dropping
My heart’s broken too
Not just my hip bone
Oh where is everyone?
I’m all alone
[Verse 2]
They got deals on socks and shoes
Left me here with these IV blues
I’m stuck in bed with nothing to do
While they’re buying twelve-dollar fondue
[Prechorus]
They texted me
“You’ll be just fine”
“Don’t forget
We need some wine”
[Chorus]
Oh where is everyone?
They’re still out shopping
I’m sipping broth
While their carts are hopping
My ribs are cracked
And my pride is gone
Oh where is everyone?
I’m all alone
Listen: https://www.freedrama.net/TellingTale6ChristmasTechSupport.mp3
[Verse]
I bought a gift it’s in the box
Instructions feel like paradox
Step one says “twist” but nothing moves
Am I the problem or is it you
[Prechorus]
So I call the line they say hold tight
Festive tunes on loop all night
[Chorus]
Press one for English press two for tears
Press three for help that disappears
Don’t transfer me just talk to me
Are you real or a ghostly entity
[Verse 2]
They said my wait time’s just five minutes
Been an hour I’m still in it
Every jingle every tone
Feels like I’m in a twilight zone
[Prechorus]
I scream “Hello” but no reply
This holly hotline makes me cry
[Chorus]
Press one for English press two for tears
Press three for help that disappears
Don’t transfer me just talk to me
Are you real or a ghostly entity
Listen: https://www.freedrama.net/TellingTale7TheSpiritofStNic.mp3
[Verse]
The snow is falling thick and bright
But the house feels cold
No warmth in sight
Dad’s on the couch
Glued to the game
Mom’s at a party
Forgot my name
[Prechorus]
Sister’s out
Chasing holiday sales
I’m here alone
Spinning my tales
[Chorus]
Where is my family
The spirit of St Nic
No time for each other
It’s gone so quick
Can we make treats
Can we trim the tree
Spend time together
Like we used to be
[Verse 2]
The stockings hang
But they feel so bare
No laughter
No love
Just empty air
The lights are tangled
The star’s on the floor
This isn’t Christmas
It’s something more
[Prechorus]
I light a candle
Wish on the flame
Bring back the moments
Don’t let them wane
[Chorus]
Where is my family
The spirit of St Nic
No time for each other
It’s gone so quick
Can we make treats
Can we trim the tree
Spend time together
Like we used to be
Listen: https://www.freedrama.net/TellingTale8UnicornsandSneezicorns.mp3
[Verse]
My nose is tickling
My eyes are red
Not a dog
Not a cat
Not the bread I just fed
It’s something bigger
Something wild and free
Is it the glitter
Or the horn that’s haunting me
[Prechorus]
Is it prancing
Is it magic dust
Something in the air I just can’t trust
[Chorus]
I’m allergic to unicorns
I’m allergic to their charm
They gallop by
I sniff and cry
They mean no harm
Or is it a reindeer
With its shiny little nose
Either way
I’m sneezing
And I’m blowing out my woes
[Verse 2]
Rainbows follow them
I’m doomed from the start
One sneeze
Two sneeze
Then they break my heart
I tried to pet one
But my hands swelled up
Now I’m hiding in a bubble with my teacup
[Bridge]
Achoo
Achoo
Oh what can I do
Unicorns and reindeers
I’m allergic to you
I’d ride you through the stars
But I’d need a tissue pack
Can’t we just be friends
And cut my nose some slack
[Chorus]
I’m allergic to unicorns
I’m allergic to their charm
They gallop by
I sniff and cry
They mean no harm
Or is it a reindeer
With its shiny little nose
Either way
I’m sneezing
And I’m blowing out my woes
Listen: https://www.freedrama.net/TellingTale9RudolfThyCrimsonBeak.mp3
[Verse]
Oh Rudolf
Thou art my gleaming guide
Thy nose
A lantern in the Yuletide tide
A beacon bright through tempest's wail
Thy crimson glow shall tell the tale
[Prechorus]
Friends
Elves
Reindeer
Lend me your ears
Tonight
We banish all our fears
[Chorus]
A reindeer
A reindeer
My kingdom for a reindeer
Thy nose doth blaze
Thy spirit clear
Christmas rides on thy ruby glow
Oh Rudolf
Lead through frost and snow
[Verse 2]
By Donner’s hoof and Blitzen’s mane
Thy light dost pierce the icy pane
The stars themselves grow jealous
Pale
For thy nose burns bright without fail
[Prechorus]
Gather round
Ye hoofed brigade
For destiny tonight is made
[Chorus]
A reindeer
A reindeer
My kingdom for a reindeer
Thy nose doth blaze
Thy spirit clear
Christmas rides on thy ruby glow
Oh Rudolf
Lead through frost and snow
Listen: https://www.freedrama.net/TellingTale10GIJANEANDMAJORPAIN.mp3
[Verse 1]
She's got boots on her feet dreams in her pack
Maps of the world and no plan to look back
But I'm in the doorway arms out wide
This little kid ain't letting her slide
[Prechorus]
You're my G I Jane my battle queen
But I'll be your major pain between
[Chorus]
I won't let you go I won't let you fly
Hold your shadow till the morning sky
You fight for the world but I fight for you
G I Jane what’s a kid to do
[Verse 2]
You’ve got a helmet I’ve got a pout
You’ve got courage I’m freaking out
I built a fort made of chairs and glue
This is war sis it’s me versus you
[Prechorus]
You're my G I Jane my soldier star
But I’m the major pain in your radar
[Chorus]
I won't let you go I won't let you fly
Guard your smile like it’s my battle cry
You fight for the world but I fight for you
G I Jane what’s a kid to do
Listen: https://www.freedrama.net/TellingTale11ChristmasBehindGlass.mp3
[Verse]
The lights still glow on our little tree
Mom tries to smile but it don’t fool me
Her hands shake when she holds her tea
I’ve never seen her this way
[Chorus]
Christmas behind glass it don’t feel real
No hugs no warmth just cold steel
Daddy don’t do what keeps you away
We need you here on Christmas Day
[Verse 2]
She keeps your picture beside her bed
Her tears fall quiet but her eyes stay red
I wish I knew how to fix what’s said
But I’m just a kid trying to pray
[Prechorus]
She’s tired but she’s strong
For me she carries on
[Chorus]
Christmas behind glass it don’t feel real
No hugs no warmth just cold steel
Daddy don’t do what keeps you away
We need you here on Christmas Day
[Bridge]
She says I’m the reason she won’t let go
Her love’s a fire in the deepest snow
But I see the weight that she won’t show
It’s breaking her every day
Listen: https://www.freedrama.net/TellingTales12TheElfWhoAlmostRuinedChristmas.mp3
[Verse]
Oh little elf with your head so low
Your candy cane dreams turned to mistletoe woe
Dropped the cocoa
Smashed the toys
Now you're hiding from the Christmas noise
[Prechorus]
But Santa's here
Don’t you pout
We’ll fix this mess
No doubt
[Chorus]
Cheer up
Cheer up
It’s Christmas time
We’ll turn this chaos into something divine
The tree still twinkles
The sleigh still flies
No ruined Christmas
Just joy in disguise
[Verse 2]
The reindeer slipped on frosty tiles
Mrs. Claus tripped on gift-wrap piles
You thought it was your fault
Oh dear
But laughter echoes
Spreading cheer
[Prechorus]
Santa said
“Mistakes are fine
It’s the love that makes us shine”
[Chorus]
Cheer up
Cheer up
It’s Christmas time
We’ll turn this chaos into something divine
The tree still twinkles
The sleigh still flies
No ruined Christmas
Just joy in disguise