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The Chile Pepper Chicks

Comedy Scene for 2 Actresses By D. M. Larson

Copyright © 2005




Cast of Characters

PEPPER: Lead guitar of the Chile Pepper Chicks who faints when nervous

CHI-CHI: Lead singer of the Chile Pepper Chicks


SCENE 1


(Lights come up on a stage set up with various boxes, etc, a nice guitar and a backdrop for a Country Star Competition)


(PEPPER and CHI-CHI enter)


CHI-CHI

I can’t believe you made us late again, Pepper.


PEPPER

I’m sorry Chi-Chi. I had to get my rhinestones polished.

(PEPPER gets out her guitar and sets it on a stand)


CHI-CHI

You need to stop worrying about your appearance and think more about the music.


PEPPER

My appearance is half of what makes us an attraction, Chi-chi.


CHI-CHI

Your appearance? What about mine?


PEPPER

Sorry, sis. But you kind of let yourself go.


CHI-CHI

What?


PEPPER

The only reason we keep you on is because of your singing.


CHI-CHI

We? We who?


PEPPER

We, me and the fans.


CHI-CHI

The fans adore me.


PEPPER

They adore me. They tolerate you.


CHI-CHI

That’s it. After this I’m going solo.


PEPPER

Good luck with that.


CHI-CHI

I can do it. I can.


PEPPER

You can’t even play an instrument. Or even write your own music. You’re lucky I can’t sing or I’d be going solo. Maybe I could just lipsinc. The lipsinc thing is big now.


CHI-CHI

You’d never make it either. You’d be like a deer in a headlight.


PEPPER

I wouldn’t.

(Gets scared)

CHI-CHI

You’re terrified of being on stage. The only reason you survive is because all eyes are on me… the singer. You’re nothing without me either.


PEPPER

(Scared)

Man this place is big.


CHI-CHI

Oh, no. Don’t you…


PEPPER

How many people are gonna be here, Chi-Chi? Are they gonna have people here for the audition? Looks like a lot of people could be here.


CHI-CHI

Nobody’s here. Just us.



PEPPER

(Starts breathing hard)

I can’t do this, Chi-Chi.

(Breathing really hard)


CHI-CHI

Come on. You’ve played hundred of bars in front of hundreds of people.


PEPPER

But not all at once.


CHI-CHI

Calm down, Pepper. It’ll be okay.


PEPPER

Can’t… breathe…


CHI-CHI

Don’t do this, Pepper. You always do this when we get close… Please not now. This is our…

(PEPPER passes out into crate so only her boot are showing)

… big break.

(Looks at her)

Pepper?

(Gets angry)

Pepper!

(Looks at watch)

You know what? You want to go solo? Fine. You go solo. Have a nice audition.

(Stomps off stage)


END OF SCENE


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