by D. M. Larson from the published play "Secrets of my Soul"
(There is a violent storm and Odysseus is alone, tied to the
mast of his ship)
ODYSSEUS
I face this test like all others. I resist as I
always resist. Though you drive me to madness, I survive. You hear
me?! I survive!
(A long silence. The siren's song is heard hauntingly
around him)
...but what is survival without
reward... what is survival with emptiness... I could have kept to the
safety of the shore, the security of my home... but there was so much
emptiness... and I never found the reward despite all my labors... I
slowly felt myself slipping away... but the sea... the sea and the
battles that awaited me... will they destroy me? Was I not prepared
for what I would face? Did I wait too long to take up my sword? Am
I
too weak now? Where am I? Where have I
gone?
(He pauses, tired. Then he is angry)
I'm lost at sea and lost inside myself? Give me
direction!
Give me an answer! I need something! Anything! Why have you
cast me
out again?! Am I lost in my madness for all eternity?!
(He is in pain. The siren's song grows stronger. He struggles
with the ropes that binds him)
Stop! Stop this now! You're tearing me apart!
(Darkness. The siren's song stops. The sounds of the storm return. Odysseus is tied to the mast again)
Love... passion... purpose... needs... they drive me
mad yet I feel empty when they are gone... my chest is filled with
hurt... I can hardly breathe... Why do I need what destroys me?
(He is quiet and the siren's song returns)
I'm so tired. I've been on this journey and fought in
this war
and yet there are still no answers... still no end... I keep
searching... keep looking... and keep finding the same emptiness... the
same trap. The same path which loops in on itself... infinity... the
unending loop. Why can't I break the cycle and find a way out?
END OF MONOLOGUE
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