JACKIE AND THE CHILESTALK

By

D. M. Larson

 

Copyright © 2005

All Rights Reserved*

 


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TIME and PLACE

 

Long ago in a little pueblo outside Old Albuquerque

 

CAST OF CHARACTERS

 

VIEJO: An old man who tells the story of Jackie and the Chilestalk

 

JACKIE: A young girl who loves Chiles

 

MAMA: Jackie’s mother

 

COW: A cow named Vacita that is sold to VIEJO (this actor has no lines but needs to have good expressions)

 

GIANT: Not really a giant but really tall. (actor can either be a tall kid or adult – guitar playing skills helpful but recording can be used)

 

JACK: A bratty boy who stole the GOOSE who lays golden eggs.

 

GOOSE: Lays golden eggs and only says “honk”

 

 

 





 

 

SCENE 1

 

(The background is a southwest nature scene with red mesas and blue sky in the background. This can either be painted nice or like something out of a Road Runner cartoon)

 

VIEJO

In a dry and dusty pueblo, there lived a little girl named Jackie who loved chiles.

 

JACKIE

                        (Carries her basket of chiles)

The hotter the better.

 

VIEJO

She couldn't resist the smell of roasted chile. She loved harvest time because she new the roasting time was near.

 

JACKIE

Mama, Mama. I picked some chiles. Can we roast them now?

 

MAMA

Is that all we have?

 

JACKIE

I'm afraid so.

 

MAMA

It's been a bad year for all the crops. There’s not much of anything.

                        (COW wanders in and looks around for food)

 

JACKIE

No beans?

 

MAMA

No beans.

 

JACKIE

No carrots?

 

MAMA

No carrots.

 

JACKIE

No peas?

 

MAMA

No peas.

 

JACKIE

Good. I hate peas.

 

MAMA

Just a few chiles.

 

JACKIE

That's all I like anyway.

 

MAMA

But this will only be enough for one stew. What will we do after that?

 

JACKIE

We could eat the cow.

                        (COW stops and looks scared. Starts to sneak out)

 

MAMA

No…

                        (COW stops and sighs with relief)

We'll sell her instead)

                        (COW looks upset and starts to sneak out again)

Come here, Vacita.

                        (COW shakes her head no)

 

JACKIE

                        (Grabs COW)

Where do I take her?

 

MAMA

To the old man on in the village.

 

JACKIE

The crazy old man?

 

MAMA

He's not crazy. Just a little loco.

 

JACKIE

Loco means crazy, Mama.

 

MAMA

Just get going and get something good for the cow.

 

JACKIE

Let's go Vacita.

                        (COW moos in protest. MAMA exits)

 

VIEJO

And that's when Jackie appeared at my door.

                        (VIEJO can roll in a door or stand ready)

 

JACKIE

Get over here, Vacita.

                        (Pulls COW to VIEJO and knocks)

 

VIEJO

Hola, hija. How can I help you?

 

JACKIE

Senor, we have no food except for a few chiles. We must sell our cow.

 

VIEJO

I will buy your cow.

                        (Takes COW and scratches behind her ear and she's happy)

 

JACKIE

Thank you, senor.

 

VIEJO

I have something you'll enjoy. Chiles.

                        (Hands JACKIE a shiny cloth bag made of a magical looking material)

 

JACKIE

Chiles? But we already have chiles.

 

VIEJO

But these are magic chiles.

 

JACKIE

Magic chiles?

 

VIEJO

They will give you more wonderful things than you can ever imagine.

 

JACKIE

I can imagine some pretty good things.

 

VIEJO

Take them to your mother and all will be good again on your rancho.

 

JACKIE

Thank you. Good-bye, Vacita.

                        (COW sticks her tongue out at JACKIE)

 

VIEJO

Jackie ran excitedly back to her Mama to tell her the news of the magic chiles.

 

JACKIE

Mama, Mama. Look at what I got!

 

MAMA

A little bag? I hope that's not it.

 

JACKIE

No, inside are magic chiles.

                        (Pulls out chiles)

 

MAMA

Magic chiles?

 

JACKIE

The old man said they would make our dreams come true.

 

MAMA

Dreams won't feed us, Jackie. I can't believe the crazy old bandito would do this to us!

                        (Takes chiles)

 

JACKIE

Mama, no!

                        (MAMA tosses chiles to DR stage)

 

MAMA

Go to your room and don't come out until I get back from the old man’s.

 

JACKIE

What are you going to do?

 

MAMA

I'm going to get our cow back.

                        (Exits)

 

JACKIE

Oh, Mama. I'm so sorry.

                        (JACKIE cries and curls up on the floor)

 

VIEJO

But I did not lie to the little girl. Those chiles were magic and while Jackie slept, a most amazing thing happened!

(Lights fade and magic Spanish music is heard. Moonlight hits DR and then a rumble sound and a chilestalk rises to from the ground. NOTE: You can stage this in a variety of ways. Have a rope from the ceiling that pulls up the chilestalk or have a drawing on the background that is uncovered from the bottom up. The sound wakes JACKIE)

 

VIEJO

When Jackie wakes, she sees a most amazing thing. A giant chilestalk.

 

JACKIE

                        (She rises)

Is that... it's a... giant chilestalk!

                        (She jumps up and down excited)

Those chiles are magic! Magic! Magic! Magic!

 

VIEJO

Told you so.

 

JACKIE

                        (Looks up)

It's so tall. I bet I can see Albuquerque from up there.

 

VIEJO

Climb up and see.

 

JACKIE

I think I will.

 

VIEJO

You won't be sorry.

 

(Magical Spanish music again. JACKIE climbs the chilestalk. NOTE: This can be done with a hidden ladder behind the chilestalk or JACKIE can exit behind the scenery of the chilestalk. Lights fade to black. Scene change to GIANT's home. The entrance to the home can be rolled in or the background can be changed)

 

JACKIE

                        (Gets off chilestalk)

Where am I? Is this Albuquerque?

 

VIEJO

No, this wasn't Albuquerque. Jackie had arrived at a giant's casa in the clouds.

 

JACKIE

That's a big door. I wonder who lives here?

 

GIANT

                        (Off. Big booming voice)

Ay yi di me! Is it a flea? Coming to visit me?

 

JACKIE

                        (Scared)

Who is that? It sounds like a giant.

                        (Hides)

 

GIANT

                        (Enters. He is just really tall. Opens door)

What can it be? What's this I see? A beanstalk at my door. But what is it for?

 

JACKIE

Actually it's a chilestalk.

 

GIANT

Who are you? And what's that do?

 

JACKIE

That's a magic chilestalk that brought me here.

 

GIANT

Chile? Chile? That's so silly.

 

JACKIE

Hey, are you the giant that scared everyone away from our pueblo?

 

GIANT

Yes, but I didn't mean to. I went down looking for something to do. It gets so lonely up here. No one else lives near. One day there was this big beanstalk and wanted to stay around the clock. But some boy has stole my goose and he said I was a monster on the loose. I've been alone ever since. Because a monster that makes people wince.

 

JACKIE

You're no monster. And I know which boy you're talking about. Jack.

 

GIANT

Jack. Yes, Jack. That's the one who attacked.

 

JACKIE

Well, I think we need to pay Jack a visit.

 

GIANT

But he scares me. One sight of him and I flee.

 

JACKIE

Don’t worry. You wait here. I'll go get that Jack and we'll get all your stuff back.

 

GIANT

Oh, thank you, but it won't do. My family stole that guitar and goose too.

 

JACKIE

Well, two wrongs don't make a right. Fine, we won't steal it back but Jack needs to learn a lesson.

 

GIANT

Wait, there's still a magic guitar. He hasn't come and taken that so far.

                        (GIANT goes to get it)

 

JACKIE

A magic guitar?

                        (Spanish guitar music is heard as GIANT enters)

Cool. What does it do?

 

GIANT

It can make people do whatever you want too. And it will do any song for you.

 

JACKIE

So why not tell it to bring your goose back?

 

GIANT

I guess I could. I didn't know if it would.

 

JACKIE

Why wouldn't it?

 

GIANT

It can't do anything to make people unhappy. It will only make happiness.

 

JACKIE

I see. So even if it makes you happy, it will make Jack sad. But Jack doesn't deserve to be happy.

 

GIANT

The guitar doesn't care. It still won't think it's fair.

 

JACKIE

So the trick is to keep Jack happy and get the goose.

                        (Gets an idea)

Ha! I got it. Play the guitar. Tell it to bring Jack and the goose here.

 

GIANT

This I will try to do. I hope it will play for you.

                        (Spanish guitar music starts to play)

It looks like it is playing. It likes what you're saying.

 

JACKIE

Come Jack! Come goose. We have a little something for you.

 

JACK

                        (Appears at the top of the chilestalk)

I heard the most beautiful music and I had to see where it was coming from. And then I saw this beanstalk...

 

JACKIE

Chilestalk.

 

JACK

Whatever.

                        (GOOSE appears at the top of the stalk)

What are you doing here? I told you to stay home.

 

GOOSE

Honk.

                        (Drops a golden egg)

 

JACK

See, you're leaving eggs all over the place now.

 

JACKIE

                        (Picks up a golden egg)

Wow, is this really gold?

 

JACK

Yeap. I've got a million of them.

 

JACKIE

Neat.

                        (GOOSE runs up to GIANT who pats her head)

 

JACK

(Takes egg)

Hands off. That's mine.

 

JACKIE

But you said you have million of them.

 

JACK

So? You can never have too much gold.

 

JACKIE

Can't you share?

                        (Spanish guitar music)

 

JACK

Well, maybe this one.

                        (Hands it over to JACKIE)

Dang, why did I do that?

 

GIANT

It's the guitar playing. It can change what you're saying.

 

JACK

Oh, look. It's the little giant. Miss your goose?

 

GIANT

I miss her so much.

 

JACKIE

Looks like she misses you too.

 

JACK

Well you can't have her back.

                        (JACK grabs GOOSE)

 

GOOSE

Honk.

 

JACKIE

But you stole her.

 

JACK

And his family stole her before I did. It doesn't belong to them either.

 

JACKIE

He's got a point. But that doesn't make what you did right. We should give the goose back to her owner.

 

JACK

And who would that be?

 

GIANT

I don't know who it be. My family never told me.

 

JACK

Finders keepers.

 

JACKIE

You didn't find her. You stole her.

 

                        (MAMA climbs to top of chilestalk with VIEJO)

 

VIEJO

Here they are.

 

MAMA

Jackie!

 

JACKIE

Mama!

                        (Runs to her)

I'm so sorry about the chiles.

 

MAMA

No, I'm sorry for being mad. These chiles were magic.

 

VIEJO

No one ever believes me.

 

JACK

Hey, you're that old guy who sold me those beans. I suppose you'll want a cut of my profits.

 

GOOSE

Honk.

                        (Lays an egg)

 

JACK

                        (Picks up egg and tosses it to VIEJO)

Here. Keep the change.

VIEJO

Too bad you aren't this nice to everyone.

 

JACK

It's my goose now so I get all the eggs.

 

MAMA

Is that you, Goosie?

 

JACKIE

Goosie?

 

MAMA

                        (Goes up and hugs GOOSE)

It is you!

 

JACK

This is your goose?

 

JACKIE

When did you have a goose, Mama?

 

MAMA

When I was a little girl, the old man sold my family a goose. It was a magic goose that...

 

GOOSE

Honk!

                        (Lays an egg)

 

MAMA

                        (Holds up egg)

...laid golden eggs!

 

VIEJO

Told you so.

 

MAMA

But then a giant came and took it.

 

GIANT

It was not me. It was Uncle Smee. He was really bad. Sorry it made you mad.

 

MAMA

I never thought I'd see her again.

 

JACKIE

Looks like we found the owner.

 

JACK

                        (Runs to chilestalk)

Fine. Keep your goose but you'll never get to enjoy it. Because I'm climbing down and cutting this stalk down and trapping you here forever.

 

JACKIE

The guitar. Stop him!

 

GIANT

It won't play I'm afraid to say.

 

JACK

But if you give me the goose, then I won't cut it down.

 

MAMA

What a horrible little boy you are.

 

JACK

But I'm a horribly rich little boy.

                        (Holds out hand)

Come little Goose. “With our combined strength, we can end this destructive conflict and bring order to the galaxy.”

                        (Starts breathing heavily like Darth Vader and then coughs)


JACKIE

What’s wrong?

 

JACK

A little asthma. Sorry about that.

                        (Mad)

Now, get over here Goose or I'll destroy them all.

 

GOOSE

                        (Scared)

Honk.

 

JACK

Come with me. It's your destiny!

 

MAMA

Please, goosie. Stay with me. We might be trapped here but I'll take care of you again.

 

JACK

I take care of her... sometimes.

 

GOOSE

                        (Shakes her head no)

Honk.

 

JACK

Fine. Stay here. I have enough gold to last a lifetime.

                        (Go toward chilestalk. Coughs and sneezes and moves away)

Oh, man. I think I'm allergic to chiles.

                        (Goes near chilestalk again and sneezes. Moves away)

 

JACKIE

Looks like you're stuck here.

 

JACK

Got any allergy medicine?

 

GIANT

No, I don't have much to help you. Wait, maybe there's something I can do.

                        (GUITAR plays and JACK's sneezing stops)

 

VIEJO

The magic guitar can make it all better.

 

JACK

It's great allergy medicine...

                        (Yawns)

Dang... allergy medicine always makes me sleepy.

                        (Sits down and falls asleep)

 

JACKIE

We did it. The goose is free.

 

MAMA

Would you like to come home with us?

 

GOOSE

                        (Happy)

Honk.

 

JACKIE

Is that okay?

 

GIANT

Of course that's what you should do. My family stole it from you.

 

JACKIE

Thank you.

 

MAMA

Let's go home, goosie.

                        (GOOSE and MAMA go down chilestalk)

 

JACKIE

It's so nice to see Mama happy again.

 

GIANT

And now I can see what will make my family happy.

 

JACKIE

What's that?

 

GIANT
A little talk with the boy of the stalk.

 

JACKIE

What will they do to him? They won't hurt him will they?

 

GIANT

When he was here before, he not only broke our door but made messes on our floor and damaged the décor. He will stay for a few days. He has some time he needs to repay.

 

JACKIE

And hopefully learn something in the process.

 

VIEJO

And he won't be too happy when he gets home either.

 

JACKIE

Why not?

 

VIEJO

There's nothing worse than rotten golden eggs. The boy never learned that the golden eggs are only good when fresh. The gold is only good if it is shared. If anyone keeps it too long, it rots.

 

JACKIE

Poor Jack.

 

VIEJO

I feel worse for his neighbors.

 

JACKIE

I guess it's time to go home. And it will be a much happier one this time.

 

VIEJO

Just remember to share those eggs.

 

JACKIE

I will.

                        (Gives an egg to the GIANT. They hug)

Good-bye my friend. I'm so glad I found those magic chiles.

 

VIEJO

Me too. Down the chilestalk with you.

 

GIANT

Come Jack into my home and I'll get the family on the phone.

                        (GIANT drags JACK into the casa and exits)

 

VIEJO

And so Jack cleaned and cleaned until the Casa in the Clouds was as good as before he came and stole the goose. The giant family then returned him home where he had another mess to clean up. And Jackie and her Mama found new happiness with the Goose and the golden eggs and that happiness spread through the pueblo as eggs were shared with all. I’m glad I gave Jackie those magic chiles. After Jack and the beans, I wasn’t so sure I wanted to try that again. But this time the magic found a girl who had a good heart. Perhaps I will try again. Anyone like to trade for some magic broccoli?

 

END OF PLAY

 



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Flowers in the Desert stage play script with monologues for teen actors ISBN-13: 978-1530169085



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Featured Monologue from the Play “Death of an Insurance Salesman”

***

"GUARDIANS OF THE WALLET" by D. M. Larson

RALPH
An ambulance is coming for you now. And the policy will cover that ride so you're in luck.

(Ralph waves good-bye and watches person go)

He's lucky. Most people wait until it's too late. Last minute is always better than never. Sometimes I think I should set up my office in the lobby of the hospital emergency room. I could probably sign up half the room as they are waiting... what else are they going to do while they wait for help? Come on. What's the number one thing on their minds? They worry about how they'll pay for the hospital. That's where I come in. I kind of see myself as a hero... swooping in to save the day... can't pay your medical bill? Let me do it for you. I know no one sees an insurance salesman as a hero but we really are. You know how much that heart attack would have cost him without me? You know how much a car accident would cost without insurance? We're not the bad guys... we're your knight in shining armor, protecting you from going bankrupt. We are the guardians of the wallet. Don't let them suck you dry. Insurance will protect you... save you... rescue you... and that's what I wanted to always do with my life. Be a hero.

END OF MONOLOGUE



**** “The Cynical Professor” a monologue by D. M. Larson

Okay class. I know you hate classes that are required for your degree so I am going to try and make this as painless as possible.

Because you're taking a lot of loans, using a lot of credit and building up some serious debt to be here, I don't want this class to be any more difficult than it needs to be. I mean you are going to be paying off these loans for the next 20 or 30 years. It's like you're taking out a mortgage and buying a house. And who can afford a house mortgage anymore when you have all these loans, credit and debts piling up just so you can get a degree in Egyptology or Greek mythology?

That brings me to lesson number one in your Freshman Orientation class. You want to make all your loans worthwhile? You want to be able to pay off your credit card debt when you graduate? Then become a lawyer.

Come on... What's with the moans and growns? Being an attorney can be great. Are you a tree hugger and love the Earth? Be an environmental lawyer. Are you into women's rights? There's a attorney for that. Want to help people who are defaulting on their mortgage and losing their homes or being crushed by credit card debt? There are lawyers for that too. Lawyers make a difference. Lawyers change things. Call an attorney if you want to get things done.

Law not for you? You could play the stock market and do some day trading. Or you could be a software designer. Maybe be an engineer and figure out new ways to get us the limitless electricity that we demand or come up with alternate fuels so we no longer need gas in our cars. You can still help the world without picking a degree that will drown you in debt that you can never pay back.

If you want to study a dead language or some mythological beast, go hang out in the library or watch the History Channel, but don't run up thousands of dollars in loans to study something that won't pay the bills. A Egyptologist is not going to change the world, but an attorney just might have the power to right some wrong.

Gandhi was a lawyer. So was Abraham Lincoln. And Nelson Mandela. These are great people that left their mark on history and transformed nations. I'm not telling you to transfer out of your history classes. History has wonderful lessons for us. I'm telling you not to major in it. Learn from history but then USE what you learned. Go out there and change things. And who better to change things than someone who understands how the system works than a lawyer.

Those of you that agree with me will go declare their majors - pre-law, engineering or economics. Those of you that don't, head on over to the library and write me a 10,000 word report on why your major is so awesome and a plan how you are going to pay off all that debt.

Class dismissed.

End of Monologue ****


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