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A woman, June, screams! She is on the ground holding
her foot. She shakes her leg and screams some more.
JUNE
AH!
Hank runs out to see what's wrong.
HANK
What happened?
JUNE
I got stung by a bee... on the foot...
HANK
Let me see.
June flops down and holds up her foot.
HANK (CONT.)
Okay, let me get the stinger out. I hear if you can get
it out without squeezing the little venom bag then it won't hurt as much.
JUNE
Ow! Ow! Ow! Get it out!
June is shaking her foot.
HANK
Hold still!
June tries to stop struggling. Hank carefully gets it
with one finger.
HANK (CONT.)
There.
JUNE
Still hurts.
She shakes her foot at him. Hank struggles and then
holds her leg still again and looks.
HANK
Looks like there is a bit of stinger in there still.
JUNE
Get it out!
HANK
I'm going to need to tweezers or something.
JUNE
Get some tweezers!
HANK
Okay, okay!
Hank runs off. *Various people can walk by and try to ignore
June and make gestures and faces if desired* Molly walks by and sees June
on her back moaning and holding her foot in the air.
MOLLY
Uh... you okay?
JUNE
No...
MOLLY
Can I help?
JUNE
I don't know...
MOLLY
Tell me what's wrong and I'll see what I can do?
JUNE
I got stung by a bee.
MOLLY
How did you get stung?
JUNE
I stopped to smell the roses.
MOLLY
What?
JUNE
You know how they tell you to stop and smell the roses?
MOLLY
They?
JUNE
Well, sometimes you hear that.
MOLLY
You do?
JUNE
Oh geez, never mind.
MOLLY
Do bee stings make people cranky?
JUNE
Yes!
MOLLY
Oh... so why were you barefoot?
JUNE
Because I wanted to be one with nature! I love
nature!
June starts ripping at the grass and flowers and throws them
in the air.
JUNE (CONT.)
Weeee! Weee! Weee! OW!
June has hurt her hand now.
MOLLY
What happened?
JUNE
Nature gave me some more good loving! Thorn.
June sucks on her thumb.
MOLLY
Nature doesn't love you back.
JUNE
What did I ever do to nature? I try to be good. I
try to leave a small carbon footprint. I have a hybrid car. I use
recycled toilet paper...
MOLLY
Recycled toilet paper... sorry, but that just sounds gross.
JUNE
It is just recycled paper... it wasn't used in a toilet
before... well, I don't think so...
MOLLY
Now I don't feel so good.
JUNE
Don't like potty talk?
MOLLY
Not really. Poop scares me.
JUNE
That's too bad because I think you stepped in some.
MOLLY
Uh! Nature strikes again... see ya...
Molly exits and drags her foot/shoe on the ground trying to
get some poop off. June sighs... a little old man, Don, shuffles
out. June ignores him. Don pokes her with his walking
stick/cane.
JUNE
Hey!
DON
Hey you back. Get off my lawn.
JUNE
This your lawn?
DON
Yup... get off.
JUNE
But I can't walk... I'm injured...
She holds her foot up to Don. He gets out his glasses
and looks at her foot closely. He smells something bad and back away.
DON
Wow, that's quite a stink.
JUNE
That's not my foot... some dog pooped on your lawn.
DON
Dag-nabbit! Darn frickin dogs!
JUNE
Such language in front of a lady.
DON
You're just a hippy. Did you rip up my flowers?
JUNE
Um...
DON
You hippies ain't got no respect for property!
JUNE
Look... don't get all worked up now...
Don is grabs his chest and falls on top of June.
JUNE (CONT.)
He got worked up.
Hank runs back in with tweezers.
HANK
I got the...
Hank sees old man on top of June.
HANK (CONT.)
Um... I'm not sure the tweezers can remove that...
JUNE
Get him off!
Hank picks up Don and struggles with him and ends up falling
and having Don on top of him. June looks and holds up her foot.
JUNE (CONT.)
Can you get the thorn out now... please?
Molly crosses the stage dragging her foot.
MOLLY
Pooh! Hate the smell of pooh!
Lights fade to black.
FIN
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